Did you know I still think about LiveJournal. Really I do. It's cool. I just haven't posted. You know, son got divorced, daughter joined and left a cult. Partied with Dr Demento. Started playing Banjo. Got a duel sport bike. More Banjo. And Banjo. Did I mention the banjo?
I might feel like writing something sometime.
Your my victim.
OK don't get me wrong. I am busy. I got lots that needs to done. So much in fact that I don't do anything I want to do. I have been doing what I don't want to do so long that I no longer want to do much. I am hoping that when the snow melts and motorcycle comes out that geocaches will look like a good idea again. We will see.
Printer gave me an error that it was out of color ink. had to print off the church bulletins so I went out to get some. 9:30 I decide I should install it so my wife can type and we can get them done. Only the new ink doesn't clear the error. So I reset the printer do all the maintenance jobs and try to set it to black and white and all result in no printing and the error. I check the serial connection to the cartage. It makes an indent on the pins so it's a solid connection. I clean the print head and remove some debris. Nothing.
So I get on chat with tec support and he started down the script. OMG I HATE THE SCRIPT. We update the firmware. Wow software doesn't fix a hardware problem. Who knew. Buy this time I am resolved that there is a short in the memory or the communication module. Tec support is going to send me a new cartage in about a week and if that doesn't fix it there going to do printer repair. So two weeks for that. Well that doesn't help me with the church bulletins.
So I find the old printer. I hook it up and download software so I don’t have to look for the disk. Get it to connect and function, only all the ink except for blue has gone hard. I try cleaning the print jets with ascertain but I can not break through. So we head to Wal-Mart at about 11 to get printer ink. When we get there new printer ink is $50 and a new printer is $30. so we get the printer.
Go home uninstall the old one while I set up hardware. Install the new one. Transfer the files form wife’s pc to mine. Install the software so I can read whatever crazy moon format she uses to make them. Print them off with a few small issues but perfectly usable. Look at the clock 12:45. Take the bulletins to the church come home pass out wake up 15 min after church starts.
Son and Wife had a big fight with Wifes parents of some kind and in the course of a few hours quit there job and decided to move in with me. I went to work thinking it was a great day, I came home Son, Wife, and grandbaby now live with me. I am now trying to babytise my house. It will take me a few days.
I am considering selling the house quitting my job and moving the hell away. Wife can come if she likes. Grandbaby can hang out. You can even come if you have or can get a job and/or can pay your own way.
It's not like I don't have anything to say or that nothing has been happening. However it all seems like such boring self serving bull that I never write any of it here. I am have been fighting so long and so hard I have trouble getting up ready to do anything but fight.
In the old village there was a harp maker and a harp maker of some skill and Integrity. Though he was faced with one major problem. Harps are not a commodity that are in high demand. As such he always found himself poor and scraping to get buy. Often times people would offer him a meal or help him with finances because he was such a fine and upright man. So much so they would ask him to resolve issues or witness events.
At one time it became popular to have his name as a witness on legal documents, which became an issue because almost immediately forged versions of his name would come up. So the man used his skills with making harps to construct a device to make a mark that no one had the skill or parts to duplicate. He then kept that device on his person at all times to make sure it would never come into the wrong hands. From then on he could charge a modest fee to put his mark on documents and soon grew to be well off and continue to be a harp maker.
Having conquered the ways of money he was left with the problems of love. He spent so much time with two jobs he found that he never had time to meet eligible ladies. Which is when his friend suggested then he take a trip to the local dancing places to meet a few and see if there was anyone he might wish to spend tome time with. This was a great plan but he didn't know where these places where so he needed his friend to show him. His friend agreed and they where soon on there way.
On the way to the first location his friend stopped and looked at him and aksed him directly. "Do you have your seal on you?" The harp maker was shocked. He checked his pocket and found it right where it always was. "Yes as always." the harper responded. Hi friend looked sad and told him "I can not do this. There is no was I can be seen out clubbing harper seels."
It was a normal night for a young boy. I had a friend over and we where having a nice time in the dark. When you grow up removed from street lights you get a special sense of the dark. You know one type of darkness is just a place where there is no light. Another is a place where there is a hole. Still another might be a tree and another something hidden. As a young boy with a friend it is nice to explore the darkness and learn these things. That is just what we where doing. I would notice a tree, My friend would see a hole. I would find a raccoon, my friend would find a deer. A game that takes hours. A good game given video games where still a few years from becoming a normal thing and TV on the farm being limited with the only real kids programing on the weekend mornings. So it was raccoons and holes, trees and deer. Stars Clouds and anything else we could see in the darkness.
Then my friend looked over to me and said. "Do you see that spot there what is it." We had looked at a lot of things. In fact we where very good at this game. Experts in a way that I don't know if kids ever become anymore. We knew what was in the dark we studied it. This sopt however did look different. It somehow seemed darker. Not a darker that you get from light being blocked out. In fact the spot was very much in the open. It was just darker. As if there was a spot where the light just didn't want to be. So we watched it. Probably like watching paint dry or grass grow, but we wanted to be experts so we watched and tried to figure out what it was. So we watched and watched. Only nothing happened. We tried all the tricks and there was nothing left to do. We had to go to the spot to find out what it was. Carefully of course because who knows what it could be. The last thing you wanted to do was stop on a rake or something stupid. So we moved to it. Slowly carefully, but nothing. Only 2 foot from it and still all it looked was darker. Clearly there was nothing in it, but it was most definitely darker. So there is nothing to be done for it. We must step into the darkness. Only as soon as we moved closer the darkness moved.
Nothing in the dark moved, it was the darkness itself. Not like a spot light move but the way a sandstorm moves only smaller more controlled more calculating. When that happened we moved as well. As in ran. AAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!! We dove for flash light and turned them on the darkness and looked to see nothing. There was nothing there at all. Surly a trick of the light and overly excitable young boys. So we went back to our game. Lights went back off though this time we kept them in our hands. Nothing to be concerned about though. The spot looked normal. Only we watched it. "Do you see that." My friend said to me. I did see it but I didn't want to. The spot was coming back. "There is nothing there." I said as I stared at the growing darkness knowing full well I saw something. We both looked at each other and pointed our flashlights at it and turned them on at the same time. Nothing. We turned them back off. Only this time the darkness didn't come back slowly. It was as if it never left and it brought a friend. Now there where two and they seem to have more form. Like a person's shape only fluid. We decided that having the flashlights on was more fun.
The next day in full day light we got to talking about it. We where not sure what to make of it, but we where sure being scared of the dark was just silly. Surly any spot day or night could look darker. Being in the shape of a person or there being more then one of them was just our imagination playing tricks. I am sure even in the daylight we could find a spot that looked darker. So we went looking. "There's one." my friend said and ran behind a building. "I think I see one." I said and headed off another way. I went to my spot I imagined to be darker. "See nothing." I yelled. "Wait. it's more of a cloud now." My friend said. "It's moving. It's coming your way." I turned and saw.. A mist a swirl of white vapor on a warm summer day come around the corner. I looked at it and it stopped moving. Then it swirled and was gone. We spent most of that day talking about it.
That night things where different. From the window we could look out in the fields and the woods. From different sports a hundred acres where in view. We looked at the fields and we could see spots, darkness, shadows. Like people like clouds like animals like an octopus of darkness. Not one not two but many. Moving around some joining together for a time then departing some always separate. Some big some small. It would all have been very fascinating if it wasn't for four of them in the tree line 30 foot from the house. We would shine a light on them and see nothing but when the light was gone they where there. Sometime moving a few feet sometimes standing fast. We did not sleep well that night.
The next day however something happened. Something to horrible to imagine. Something devastating. My friend had to go home so that we could go to school the next day. He was on the lookout and so was I. Could we see them everywhere? Where we imaging more then there was? Where we imaging it all? How could others not talk about this stuff all the time if it was and issue. We didn't know. We do not want to be scared of the dark and we will not be. So home he went and home I stayed. A normal farm day for me and a more or less normal night. I did look out. I did think I saw things in the fields and trees. The four things watching where now two. I would not be afraid of the dark. I ignored them closed my eyes and slept. The fact I didn't sleep much the night before helped a lot.
The next morning going to school get's me up before the sun. In fact the bus picks me up at that time of year before the first rays of the sun come over the hill. In a time just before twilight I wait at the end of a long driveway. I look around and I can see them. All far away except for one. One from the trees waits sitting there by the trees. I ignore it. It is my imagination. Only my imagination seems to slowly be bringing it closer. Closer, closer it comes. I stand there and it is practically on top of me. I see details of it not so much with my eyes but with feelings. Describing it is almost like describing a nightmare. No matter what you say about it you just can't really describe it though you swear you can remember it. Then it was on top of me.
I closed my eyes and willed myself strong. I would stand my ground. I would not be scared of dark. I would stand there I would not go. It was cold. It was scary. My legs and arms grew tied. It felt like I was fighting only I didn't move. I stood there and willed myself strong. Then it was gone. The bus came and I went to school and didn't tell anyone. Not even my friend.
It was not the last time I saw them. It was the last time one touched me. I don't look at the darkness as often or as hard as I did so many years ago. At some point I quit paying attention to what the shadows do. When I have time and when some are around I can still make them out if I try, but no good ever seems to come of noticing them. So I do not try to often. I have heard others talk of what I believe to be the same thing. People call them shadow people but sometimes other names. Are they the same. Are they different. Are they there. Are they imagination. I don't know.
I can tell you this. Stand strong. Don't be afraid of the dark.
No matter what you think or what you believe you have to accept that when you do what you have done it leads to where you are.