December 16th, 2007

redneck hick cracker country home mom pi


Twelve years ago me and my wife where driving along on a country road one day while the kids where gone when in the grass I see two little pointy ears in the grass. As I drive past I saw 4 more sets. So I stopped. The wife looked at me and said "Whats going on." I jumped out of the car and said. "I see little ears." I start walking back and by the time my wife was out of the car there where 7 kittens running to me. I sat there petting the kittens while my wife came over. She wasn't to thrilled with the dirty little kittens, but she had to admit they where cute and stopped to pet them a little herself. I looked through the grass and could find no sign of a mother. After a hour of searching I was beginning to run out of time because the kids where coming home. So I told the wife "Get ready to run." See looked at me and said "What?" But as soon as she said that I started running. For a split second she was shocked but then she started running as well. And behind us where seven attention starved kittens. She got to the car just in time. I already had it started and the kittens where closing fast. Before they could get under the tires I zoomed away and we went home.

When the kids came home I had been thinking about the kittens along the side of the road for a little bit. The next day they where still on my mind through work. When i got home I told my wife. "I have to rescue those kittens". I waited for the kids to come home and said. "Want to help me save some kittens." SURE. They shouted. The wife wasn't quite so interested. She didn't stop me though.

So I take my kids to the place where the kittens where. The hole way there there asking questions about the kittens. How are we going to save them. How did they get there. The kids where 4 and 7 at the time and this was quite the adventure. However when we got there things where a little different then the kids imagined. My 4 year old daughter reacted much the same way as he mother had only with less tact. On look and she didn't want anything to do with the dirty little animals. My son on the other hand thought they where great. The kittens thought he was great also and they where all over him. All six. I searched high and low for the missing kitten. I searched again for the mother. It was obvious the kittens hadn't eaten in a week. I could only home that someone rescued the one kitten. I knew if i didn't do something the others where not long for the world. So I put them in a cardboard box and brought them back to the car. My daughter did not like the box sitting next to her though. WAAAAA WAAAA WAAAA. "But I have to put the box down if I don't take the kittens they will die." "I don't want to sit by the kitties." She cried. "I'll sit with them." My son piped up. My daughter looked relived and I switched the kids places. Then it was time to head home.

I told my son. The kittens could make it hard to drive if they got out so make sure to keep them in the box or one of them could get hurt. "I will" he beamed with determination and a huge smile. And he did. At first it was not a problem as the kittens had never been in a car or a box and where totally dumbstruck as to what was going on. However after 15 min the kittens where used to there new life in a box and wanted to explore. I heard the first scratching on the box. Soon I hear FLOOP. I kitten has thrown itself against the box lid. My son starts Giggling. That however was short lived as the next kitten when FLOOP and stuck with his little kitty claws in the little hole in the lid. "What should I do" he called up. "Push them back in the box." I said. And he did. Over and over the kittens jumped at the opening and he pushed them back down. Soon they started jumping so well that they could put there head out the crack in the box and start scrambling out almost instantly. My son was doing a great job pushing them back in but he was clearly outnumbered. It was about two miles from home when he was overwhelmed by the kittens. "What should I do" he yelled. "just keep trying" And he did. I was scared it was to much for him but he handled it well keeping all six of the wild kitties at bay. I pulled in the drive way and told him "We live to close to the road to let these kittens run out we have to get them under control." With a huge effort he grabbed all six cats through them in the box and covered the lid with his body. I was so proud.

I carried the box in the house and my wife frowned at me. What are we going to do with those dirty things. I looked at them and looked at her. I looked at her and I looked at them. "Ummmm clean them?" I stammered. "Fine take them up to the tub." So I took the box full of struggling kittens up to the tub with my boy smalling behind me every step of the way. Six kittens in the tub and I start running water. I expect a mad dash, but each of the kittens walked up to the slow filling water line and started drinking like they hadn't had water in days. I took barbie shampoo and started cleaning and scrubbing. And the boy was cleaning and scrubbing, and giggling. And I was giggling. The wife heard us having so much fun she came and started scrubbing also. Then she started giggling with us. Then my daughter came in. She wanted to be part of the fun but the dirty kittens scared her. So she went in her room and came back with one of the hair brushes for her Barbie and handed it to me. I thought I would try it just to make her feel better. It was the most wonderful tool for cleaning kittens in the world. Before long we had six clean little angles. I handed one to my daughter and finally she had a kitten they way she expected a kitten to look. My wife was pleased also.

So we have six kittens and two kids who have been out for two hours after school and have not eaten yet. So she makes them sandwiches. My son sits in front of the tv and starts to eat. But a kitten sees him and RUNS turds him. Five others follow. Before long my son is holding a sandwich above his head as six kittens try to jump, climb him or anything they can do to get this sandwich. After a quick sandwich rescue we put down some cat food and six little kittens eat until there bellies are twice as wide as the kittens are. I put them all in the litter box and one by one I make sure they all use it once in the next hour. I also watch one by one as they all take there turn jumping on the table. All except one.

My wife then asks. What are we going to do with six kittens? Take them to be adopted I tell her. Someone is bound to want a cute kitten. Awww my son says I wanted to keep them. Yaa my daughter said which shocked me to see she liked them so much now. "Lets keep one" I say. "If your mom thinks it's ok." "OK" she says "but which one." "This one" I say holding up the one who didn't jump on the table. "What should we call it" my son asked. "how about needles" my daughter said. I was so happy she wanted to love the kitten also and we all agreed needles was a good name.

That is how I got my cat needles.

One time she took my kids monkey puppet and came through the house humming like she had a mouse.

One time she had her first batch of kittens under the treadmill in the house and she had no idea how to move them around and was so happy when we put them back under when they rolled out.

One time she cought a mouse and brought it to my wife who yelled "DROP IT." So the cat did. only the mouse was still moving so she yelled "PICK IT UP" and the cat did.

Once I grabbed one of her kids off the table and she jumped up sank all 4 claws into my leg and bit me to protect her kid.

She has been in every house with my and my wife for 12 years. She was the best cat I ever had.

Today she died.

This is the last time I will ever get to tell her story.

I am sad.